NEWS FLASH:  President Bush appoints "[tag]Pretzel Logic[/tag]" to the newly created Cabinet Post, Secretary of Presidential Communications. This position will assume the responsibilities of the 's office and will focus on explaining the President's intricate "12 Point Plan for Building a Better America"

President Bush stated earlier, "I believe that Preztel Logic is the best man to express my thoughts and inner workings of my mind to the American public."

The Lang Report (TLR) has discovered that Pretzel Logic previously worked for Corp. where he was V.P. of Quality & Accuracy Assurance. He is credited with implementing and overseeing Fox's "Fair and Balanced" news reporting policies.

President Bush was later heard saying, "I can only hope that Pretzel Logic will live up to his name and remagnitize the White House Press Office which, as you know, has come under undue mutiny lately."

The Lang Report will continue to watch this unexpected turn of events and keep our readers up on the latest developments. We would like to comment and say that we believe this appointment will create much controversy. It appears that Mr. Logic has been accused of spinning his stories to suit certain special interest groups so it sure will be interesting to watch.

TLR has been granted an exclusive interview with Mr. Logic at a time still to be determined. Stay tuned......We'll keep them honest!